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Submitted on
April 16, 2006
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15.4 KB


18 (who?)
Dear Sally,
I never meant to hurt you, but
Tears still flowed into your eyes
All I ever said
Was that I wanted to die
And you cried...

Happiness evades me
I'm simply chasing the stars
No matter how fast I run
No matter how far
Those stars always slip away from me

My dear, I love you
But I only make you cry
All of this pain, does it fade
When I die?
I only wish for you, there was
Some better way
To say,

Untitled Poem #18
Believe me
It heals me
Everything is true
If not to you
It heals me
To see you bleed
And what I need
Is to bleed

Untitled Poem #19
At last  my fate is set in stone
As the blood falls and I am alone
Far beyond the reach of any light

Blood is like a rose in bloom
Such beauty as
I've never seen before
Spilling from my body
Pooling on the floor
Splattering upon the pages
Like stars splattering the night
At last in this dreadful world
An end to it lays in sight...

The Monster
She follows me
Each day and night
Her words haunt me
Her cruelty and lies
I thought I knew her once, but
There's a stranger in her eyes
I knew that her soul had been cut
Away, last time she said goodbye
And said to me, I know you're alone.

Untitled Poem #20
When you fell, some part of me, too, died
Standing out in the rain, waiting for you,
I cried.
You'll never return.

I Didn't Mean To Kill You
I didn't mean to end you
I'm sorry I made you bleed
I'm sorry I hurt you so
I'm sorry this has to be
I didn't mean to kill you
I'm the one who should have died
But I had to go on, you looked so beautiful
When you cried...

        was the same as
        And the day before
        And the day before

The fortune teller said
        I have a long life
                                 ahead of me.
        I may even live
        to be
                                 117 years old.

So…what is that
supposed to mean
                                 to me?
Am I supposed to be
That I may even have
104 years left
                                ahead of

would be
          37986 days.
          911,664 hours
          54,699,840 minutes.
          3,281,990,400 seconds.

And yet as I watch
This clock on
                                the wall
It's not moving
                                at all
It's just frozen
                                in time.
If it doesn't move
I'm quite ready
Go out of
                                my mind.

If every single
Lasts as long
as this one does,
I'll die inside
And face an           eternity
Of sleepwalking
Before I
                           the end,
Before I finally

They say
       our hearts
                beat around
                       2 billion times
                              in our lifetime.
I wonder
         how many
                has mine
                                 so far?
It's kind of
         scary, when
                 you think
                        about it.
Every time
          it beats,
                 one beat

How do
       you know
                you'll live
                       to feel it


And that's

I have
          no way
          of knowing
                           or if
                                     it's going to

Torture (saved the most disturbing for last...)  
I will torture you.
I will make you bleed.
I will cut you until you cry
And watch as your tears
Mix with your blood
Same as you have always
Done to me.

I will cut you.
One cut
For every cruel word
You have ever spoken to me.
One cut
For every time
You have cut me.
One cut
For every drop of blood
I have shed.
One cut
For every tear
You have made me cry.

I will rip your existance
Apart at the seams.
I will tear you apart
I will make you feel
All you forced upon me.
I will shatter your mind
I will smash your soul
I will crush your heart in my hand
I will make you pay at last.
I will tear your body to bits.

Let's see, what shall I do to you?
Small, shallow cuts all over your body
Piercing your skin with white-hot knives
Rip open your chest, squeeze your heart.
Break your trembling limbs
Rip you apart
Drive you insane
With all the pain
You will feel,
Just as you did to me.

But while you'll beg me to kill you
I won't be the merciful one
To let you die.
I want you to live.
I want you to bleed.
I want to see you cry.
I want you to feel all the pain
You made me feel
That drove me insane
With wounds never to heal.
It's because of you I fell.
You drove me over the edge.
You made my very existance hell.
You made me wish I was dead.
So blame this not on me,
But on yourself.
It was you
That chanced the meeting
Of brush and paper
Creating the face
You see
The face twisted by anger
As it shatters your body and soul
The face mad with hate
The eyes iron-hard and cold.
You tortured me
With your cruel games
Each and every day.
I will never be the same
My soul was ripped away
And for all you've done to me
I'll make you pay...

I'll torture you
As you tortured me.

I was extremely disturbed back then. As well you can see.
I should warn you. These are the poems I wrote in seventh grade that earned me a week and a half in a mental institution. They are...extremely disturbing...Everyone who read them was afraid I was having destructive and self-destructive thoughts, so I got chucked into a looney bin. But they turned out okay for something I wrote when I was in a right state in seventh grade. So you can read them, but don't say I didn't warn you that they're disturbing.

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Zazzine Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Why'd they chuck you in a looney bin? I wrote this kind of stuff when I was in seventh grade, but I wasn't crazy.  I just wanted to write good, disturbing stories.  I think those people were overreacting.  This is great poetry.
Romanticide696 Featured By Owner Dec 1, 2012
I was reading these from my brothers account and decided to just make one to say how beautiful these are. I myself write such poetry and have been inspired by your works.
kaikadragon Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2012
Is it a bad thing that a lot of those remind me of my own seventh grade experience? Anyways, the last one is creepy, but a really good poem. I like them.
DivergentGames14 Featured By Owner Jun 7, 2012
Today. That's me.
Hollyflower27 Featured By Owner May 1, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
lol this is why I don't ever share most of my poetry with people X3 I love them!
Xtemporary-insanityX Featured By Owner May 2, 2012  Professional Writer
Thanks. XD
Hollyflower27 Featured By Owner May 2, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
np X3
evilrobotgirltamlin Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2012
I didn't mean to kill you by far my favorite!!!
SanguineDisciple Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Errr....These are disturbing? I shouldv'e really been institutionalized then... I find them beautiful.
Dracojen Featured By Owner Sep 23, 2011  Professional Traditional Artist
The poem called Blood..Ilove that one the best
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